Engagement season is just around the corner and many a fella will soon be hunting down the perfect ring for his sweetheart. So how can you make sure that the unthinkable doesn’t happen: he gets you a ring you, well let’s just say, aren’t crazy about? Once you two have pretty much decided to take the next step, how can you make sure the bling on your finger is something you actually want to wear the rest of your life? If you’re anything like me (and Carrie Bradshaw), the wrong ring on this finger could have could have been all kinds of ugly (my hands are more like paws: short and stubby, so the wrong cut and style would have looked awful!).
Today I’m sharing with you some ways to get your guy on the right track. Please note, these hints should only be used once the couple has already had ‘the talk’ – where they decide they are ready to move forward in their relationship and all that’s missing is the proposal and the details. Be advised, these should never be used if the couple is just flirting with the idea of getting married!
#1: Be verbal – he can’t read your mind, so don’t expect him to!
Although you’ve pinned 7 different rings that all have the same structure and style, if he is anything like my husband, your groom to be does not keep up with the latest on your Pinterest boards. Find ways to subtly (seriously ladies – subtly) and specifically comment about your friends’ engagement rings or rings in general. You could say things like “I love your ring Jenny, princess cut is always so beautiful!” OR you could mention how you love this old ring from college because it’s so dainty or due to it’s antique look. Or you could mention how at the end of the day you just prefer jewelry that’s simple and clean. The key is positive reinforcement (avoid saying thing like “Kate’s ring is so not cute – I loath baguettes!”) and being precise in what you like. He can’t read your mind as to why you like a ring, so make sure you fill in the details!
#2: Have your gals do the dirty work!
As I mentioned before, it doesn’t matter how many clippings you’ve saved or how many rings you’ve pinned, he most likely won’t ever see them. However your ladies can be your best advocated in pointing your guy in the right direction. Share your likes (once again, be super specific) with one of your besties and have her share it with your beau. Make sure she does it with tact and says something to the effect of “I saw Susie looking at this last week and she said it was the perfect ring… just thought I’d help you out – just in case, for whenever that time comes”, and then have her add in something about a specific super important detail; for example “she especially loves that it is a yellow diamond”… Yeah, there are many guys out there who take pride in picking out the ring himself, however having a photo of what you like and why will go a long way toward making sure your most important criteria is met.
#3: Have an open convo about it – honesty is both the best policy!
Once you’ve had that all important DTR where you’ve both decided its time to move forward toward marriage, it would then (and only then) be appropriate to suggest checking out rings together to get an idea of what looks good on your finger and what you both like. He has no intention of getting you a ring that you won’t like and you certainly don’t want to get a ring that makes your finger look fat, so take a trip together to a jeweler to scope things out. Once again, be honest and specific about what you do and do not like (without being offensive about it). If he wants to choose it without you there, just make sure you point out the one or two features that are most important to you and let him have fun with the rest. Make sure you don’t get too attached to an individual ring, just in case he wants to design something for you himself or surprise you – the key is that you get an idea of what he likes and he gets an idea of what you like and in the end, everyone will be happy with the result!
Happy shopping friends!